..i just laid in the sun. no sun screen. but i wanted it. wanted to feel the burn for a min. haven’t had a sun burn in so long it feels like. used to always have such severe tan lans all my childhood, growing up in south florida as i did. turning shower curtains into slip and slides with my sisters. filling the back of the pick up truck with water, stuffing it with towels to make a small pool for us. was so beautiful. i let my cells cook. could feel the heat start to creep into my body. but in this sort of way that’s so even. so all at once given the way it’s being heated. in the sun, it’s as if your being cooked from the inside out. like in a microwave. but this sort of radiation is coming from the nearest star. our sun. the burning get’s a bit stronger. i focus on my breathing. telling my body to let go. started with my fingers. numb… limp. i feel the detachment follow up my arm… down my body. my shoulders and neck hold on last. as if it’s my body’s last stand with letting go to my mind or something. i try and bend down inside my head. talk with my mantel… tell it it’s safe. that i simply want to let go for a min. nothing more. only a min. it’ll allow me to fix some things on the inside of our shared brain. a brain that is connected to our shared heart. but in order do this… i need to stop all activity on the hard drive… and see what can be observed. My body sighs… my mantel agrees. my neck… simply detaches. it’s such an odd feeling at first. used to say it felt like floating. only now… feels more like sinking. falling deep inside my head. but then… once i open my eyes on the inside… everything feels so… big. so huge. i stop and stare in awe for a min… only to quickly realize how dangerous this place can be at the same time. too much time can make you a little… zany. too “out there”.